Tuesday, May 18, 2010

6 Weeks Postpartum

I had my six week checkup on Friday and it was all good news. I have healed perfectly according to my doc so I am cleared for all normal activities. This means that I can exercise again! Now I can drop the last 15 of my 50 pounds that I gained during pregnancy. I plan on going to our gym here at the new apartments at least twice a week and going on walks with Sarah whenever the weather here is nice.

I was also told to start weaning myself off of my blood pressure meds. When the nurse took my blood pressure it was 104/50. (Pretty low considering that it had been up to 165/105 while I was in labor and 120/80 is the norm.) The doctor thinks that my blood pressure has regulated itself and I no longer need the meds to do it for me. I am more than excited about that! I was worried about being on a long term maintenance medication. I have another follow up in two weeks to make sure that I can keep a stable and regular blood pressure on my own.  

As far as how I am doing emotionally, I am doing much better. I feel like I am starting to figure out Sarah's cries and her schedule. I enjoy being home with her during the day and I am getting a handle on getting more things accomplished. I love watching her personality emerge. She has started smiling in response to people smiling at her and if something strikes her as funny which is always a joy to see, Seriously her smiles get so big and you can see her gums. There's something about a baby's smile that is so genuine. They don't have a fake smile or a smile reserved for the camera. They just smile and joy shines on their face. Sarah's smile is so amazing.

She also loves her playmat! I can put her there (if she's been fed and changed) and she will play for about 45 minutes. Those poor toys dangling don't have a chance. She kicks them and bats them and smiles because she knows she's done something. I love watching her play. There's something about watching her that reminds me of the magnitude of God. Sarah's birth and life are great reminders of how God works. I just hope to be the parent that he intended me to be. I know that with His help and guidance I can and will be.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

My First Mother's Day

Tomorrow is Mother's Day and it's the first one that I get to celebrate as a mother. Obviously this day will have a special place in my heart and memories. However, not just because I am the one being celebrated. Now I get to relate to my own mother in a new way and love and appreciate her all over again.

This year I can finally understand why my mom still reminds me that I was a full two weeks late.(Still after 23 years!) My own baby girl was just a few days late before I was induced and I remember being cranky for the entire last month of my pregnancy. I was so uncomfortable and swollen at the end that I was praying Sarah would show up at 37 weeks but we went all the way to our scheduled induction. If I was forced to wait it out until 42 weeks, I would have gone crazy! (Sorry Mom!)

I understand the hard work it took to bring me (and my siblings) into this world. My mother endured natural childbirth 5 times! I went 4 hours and was ready for my epidural despite my deep fear of needles. All of the laboring and pushing is worth it though when you see your sweet baby for the first time. (Just like my mom said it would be.)

This year I can truly appreciate the time and effort my mother put into being a stay at home mom. I am one now and it's no piece of cake. There are times when the baby is screaming and the house is filthy that I feel like I will never get the hang of things. Then when Sarah smiles at me or coos at me it's all worth it. I get to be home and see all of her milestones. I have a husband who can financially support us and is all for me being at home. This is a blessing in and of itself. My mom is the one who taught me the importance of being there for your kids.

But most of all this is the year that I can honestly grasp the depths of my mother's love for me. I know what it is to love someone so much you want to take away all their hurts, worries, and fears. To love them so much that you are willing to take those burdens on yourself so they can avoid them. I love my daughter fiercely and would do pretty much anything for her. Where did I learn this love? My mom. She has loved me openly and fully for my entire life. Watching her I learned what a real mom is supposed to look like. I hope I can be at least half the mother she is. If I accomplish that then I know my daughter will have one stellar mom and a great upbringing.

So thanks Mom for being there and loving me. And thanks for making me truly appreciate my first Mother's Day.

Monday, May 3, 2010

A happier note

My last post seemed so depressing. I promise that I'm not always like that. It was just one of those moments. You know the kind where you are at your wits' end because the baby won't stop crying, you can't remember the last time you ate or showered, and to top it off one of the dogs knocked over the trash can. (Yeah it was one of those days.)

In other news, Ryan and I have almost finished moving to our new apartment! I absolutely love it here. I feel like we have more space to spread out and really live and be a family. We gained about 200 sq feet which is a lot in the world of apartments. We plan on being here for a couple of years at least so I am looking forward to making it seem like more of a home rather than a rental. I can't wait to pick out paint colors and wall hangings and the like. We had those at the old place, but somehow it's much more exciting here. Granted it will be a gradual process, because while I stay home with Sarah all day I still haven't been able to accomplish more than having us both clean and fed when Ryan gets home from work.

Speaking of Sarah, our little girl celebrated her one month birthday yesterday! I can't believe we have been blessed with her for that long already. Sometimes I feel like it has just been one day since we came home from the hospital. God has truly granted us a little angel. I am so lucky to be this girl's mom and to share the joys of parenting with Ryan. It's been amazing watching him parent. Seeing him be a dad is something I don't think my heart will ever tire of.

I'm hoping that we get into a routine sometime soon. I didn't think I was one who liked structure but living with an infant has taught me that I do in fact miss it. The only predictability in my life right now is that my little girl will most definitely want to eat about every three hours, and that's perfectly okay for now. We are more than a little scattered right now. There is STUFF everywhere from the move. Boxes, baskets, and totes of stuff! And I thought we did a good job of downsizing. That doesn't even cover the stuff that we still have left to move over from the old place. Oh well, it's what makes life fun! The spontaneity and chaos that is. If everything were structured and routine I'm sure I'd be begging for some disorder. The only things that matter are my daughter, my husband, and my dogs. We are all under one roof and happy!