Wednesday, September 28, 2011

My Thankful Project

Recently I noticed that I spend a lot of my time complaining and/or being upset/angry/grumpy/cranky (the list could go on for a while...) about something. I discovered that I have a lot of self pity and I really wanted to do something about it. I don't want to look back on my kids' early years and realize that I spent all that time angry and upset. I want to have the kind of memories you find in storybooks. I want to be the mom that spent her time on the floor with her kids instead of being so worried about a clean house they have to play alone.

How did this realization come about? Well it was all thanks to MOPS Monday! My wonderful mentor mom challenged us to thank our husbands for the little things, things we may not even register that he does. She told us it would not only improve his mood, but ours as well. It could also open and improve communication, which is something I always struggle with! So I thought,

"Hey I should give this a try."  

I have a really bad habit of belittling the things Ryan does. If he comes home from work stressed out or tired, I have a quip all ready for him.
 "You're tired?? I was up every two hours with the baby last night"
"Do you even know how many times I've been puked on today, who cares about traffic?"
"Yeah well how many times did you deal with a bodily fluid today?" 
"At least people at work can talk to you!"

I know, I'm cringing too! No wife of the year awards here. I would like to blame it on hormones, but the truth is it was self pity. (I told you I had a lot of it.) I had been feeling sorry for myself, because things have been a little difficult around here. The kids have been behaving and it't not like I'm dealing with a huge crisis or anything, but our routine has changed since Andrew has come. Sarah's naps are unpredictable (and sometimes nonexistent), I have a harder time getting out of the house, my sleep is erratic, and it seems like our dogs have suddenly forgotten they were ever house trained! It's just the little things piling up and I was feeling like my life was nothing but one mess after the other. 

Enter MOPS... my attitude totally changed. I decided to make a conscious effort to have a more thankful heart. I want to notice the blessings I have and instead of getting angry about something, find something to be thankful for. So I'm going to be more appreciative of my husband. I'll thank him for taking out the trash, even if it is a chore I just expect him to do. I'll thank him for helping me or getting things for me. I'll notice, because if I'm honest, I don't notice when he does the little things. If the little things piling up can stress me why can't the good little things lift me up?

I'm going to take time to be thankful that Sarah can communicate well. And that even if she does dump out her toys, it's only because she wants to find something to do with her mom. I need to be thankful for the fact that she wants my attention because sometime (not too far away) she's going to choose friends over me. I need to realize that this time with Andrew, is not something I can get back. I should be thankful for all the cuddles and newborn smell. It won't last forever.

So in short, my mentor mom is a genius! I'm really excited about trying this theory. Because no one really likes going around being miserable. So my thankful project is to really be there and notice the things in my life I should be thankful for. It's really an attitude check if I'm being blunt and honest. (Which this blog is meant to be.) I'm very blessed in my life and while I may know that, I rarely take the time to acknowledge it. I am so thankful for a loving husband, a marriage that is constantly growing and improving, two healthy kids, and friends and family who support and love us!
My husband who loves me in spite of the fact that I am a crankypants!

My two BEAUTIFUL, LOVING babies!

Anyone else in need of a thankful project/attitude check?

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